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A poem by Amy Owens (Heartbeat Poetry)

Amy Owens

    The deep blue ocean beckoned me
    Like a silent whisper that only I could hear
    Quickly I thought ‑be spontaneous
    Throw caution to the wind and set sail
    The ocean breeze flowing through my hair
    Wide open space, sunshine and salt water
    I packed my belongings and headed for the great unknown
    My mind scrolled through my unwritten list
    Of what I need, I might need and well just incase
    Surely this was right for me
    After all what could go wrong
    This ship could weather any storm
    A great adventure awaited
    So with the wind in my sails
    I ventured where I’ve never been before
    My mind already had an ideal location
    I could see it, smell it, feel it
    My imagination painted such a beautiful picture
    Etched with happiness, contentment, security
    This would be the life for me
    I was sure God would agree
    I thought what could be better
    Oh how I thanked God
    For the great plan He had for my life
    How wonderful He is
    I praised Him for how He had blessed me
    I’m happy so this must be Gods will
    I convinced myself
    Even the sun celebrated with me
    As it began to retire for the day
    And painted golden shades of yellow
    Mixed with burnt orange and red
    Proving this world is a canvas to showcase Gods artistic love
    Autumn colours now brought an autumn breeze
    Cooler yet still beautiful
    As it tried to take me in another direction
    I kept a firm grip on my sails
    I’m sure I’m still on the right track
    This was Gods plan — right?
    Onward I sailed towards my dream destination
    But the once smooth waters now stirred
    The gentle sway of my ship
    Turned a little more fierce
    Making it harder for me
    To stay upon my feet
    Discouragement, disappointment,
    Fear, doubt overwhelmed me
    I hadn’t planned for this
    Surely if God called me
    It should be all plain sailing
    Winter waves now smashed into my hull
    As anger rose in my heart
    The sun had disowned me
    Now hidden behind dark clouds
    That wept upon me
    Like the tears that flooded my heart
    As I questioned where are you God”
    Are you here” why“
    I battled on anxiously navigating
    My own way through the relentless violent storms
    That came one after the other after the other
    My unsinkable was breaking away
    And the icy waters made me gasp for breath
    And I cried out God save me“
    The few moments following I don’t recall
    As if in a lapse of time
    But in the midst of noisy chaos
    In the dark of night
    I heard a small whisper do you trust Me”
    yes God I do” I anxiously replied
    Then let go of the shipwreck” He told me
    I can’t God I will sink” I said desperately
    And again I hear ” Do you really trust Me”
    yes but can you sort this mess and then we can talk”
    Let go of the shipwreck” He said once again
    I realised in those moments
    I must trust with my actions not my words
    My fingers stiff with fear grasped the remnants of the ship — my safety
    And I thought it’s all or nothing
    So I made a choice to let go and let God
    As the waters calmed the sun in the horizon stretched from slumber
    To welcome a new day
    To my surprise I realised I was now safely on shore
    This wasn’t what I planned
    Or where I expected to be
    Yet I knew it was the beginning of my journey not the end
    I didn’t know what was to come
    But I knew He wanted to take me
    To places I had never been
    Deeper to where I alone
    Could never navigate
    He was to be the Captain of my ship
    He would steer I would trust
    So now when I begin to question
    When I’m afraid to do as He asks
    Or wait patiently for His direction
    I remember in the midst of the storm
    He is my captain, my anchor
    Can I say YES with my actions
    When fear tries to grip me
    And His voice echos in my heart
    Do you trust Me?”

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